I try to remain positive. I try to pause and reflect before acting. I will try to see the whole picture. All three sides to each story. Your side, my side, and the correct side.
But sometimes in order to remain positive, you’ve got to set boundaries. And setting boundaries involves removing toxicity.
Setting boundaries does a couple of things for us. They provide the necessary space we need to spend time with ourselves. They also let others know how much time you have to focus on them, when you’re not spending it focused on yourself.
Setting boundaries is difficult. At times, setting boundaries can hurt others feelings. And hurting feelings is not something I actively try to do. But if we don’t set boundaries, we can often offer too much of ourselves, draining our cups, while forgetting to fill them back up.
To start, try setting small boundaries. Maybe spend a few less minutes each day on your phone. Or turn it on focus mode for 30 minutes while you’re on your neighborhood walk. From there you can move to larger boundaries, like telling a family member you need space because they’re suffocating you. Or telling a friend that you can’t listen to them vent about an unhealthy relationship any longer because it’s draining for both of you.
Ultimately, however you decide to set boundaries, doing so will provide you the space you’ve been desiring, while gently letting others know you need that space. In the end, most people will understand and appreciate your boundaries, and those feelings of relaxation and appreciation will soon begin to fill your cup again.